Girls have very delicate, sweet and innocent emotions.. When they are at their parents home.. they make them smile.. & when they get married.. they brighten up thier husband's life..They are magical.. they are too flexible , that u can mold them anyway u want..
* I am a GirL *
- I am 19 years old.. Akloti LadLi sister of three brothers...Living like a princess ...A family is coming to see me today... I am feeling so shy and confused..
- I liked him so much... What a teenage girl wants except that…! A well-educated, handsome, well-off man… I liked him with million hearts at first glance. He was just so perfect.. Instead of engagement, my parents decided to do Nikkah & within few months I became Mrs.him …
* Fantasy* Its the most beautiful phase of my life. He calls me from abroad daily…every-second sms, romantic gifts, skyping, chatting all day long.. I am gradually falling in Love with him…He is so caring and loving. We have great Understaning..Uffff ...I am living a fantastic dream.
*Blink*
Just after my bachelors, I became "Dulhan" and officially came to his home..
* Day 1: Its 1st day of my marriage, my mother and sister-in-laws are not so happy, coz my parents didn’t treat them well yesterday. I am so coward..I am so confused.. What a newly wed dulhan can say? My husband is cursing my parents. I don’t know what to do.. I am just quiet. Its the first stage of my Compromise.
* First Week: I am trying my best to adjust in his family. I miss my home badly. My husband doesn’t like to visit my parents often coz it will reduce his value. I am upset. I am trying hard to understand a NEW he. Thumbs up..! I have sucessfully passed another stage of Compromise...
* First Month: Oh, so he smokes as well, Shock after shock… tears after tears… Now I am having an idea about his past affairs too.. So what if he had affairs in past..?! He is all mine now... Lets Compromise & be happy !
* Few Months Later: My in-laws are having so many issues. Why my parents don’t visit me… and when they do, they don’t like it too..! Why my parents didn’t greet them on Eid? and why they didn't bring this and this in Eidi...? I have sealed my lips… gulped my tears… crushed my emotions... I am smiling...I am a Compromising Robot....! Order me, i'll smile.. Beat me up, i'll cry... Threat me, i'll glue my lips and gulp my sobs..
* One Year: All my sorrows have just vanished. I am holding my cutest daughter in my arms.. Everyone is happy. I smiled & closed my eyes…
But why my parents didn’t do the “RASAMS”.. I am being punished…It is hell depressing… I m going through Post Partum depression (Sounds silly...?? give it a Google search. 90% of women go through it, even their life partner don’t know about it. Instead, they curse the girl and her upbringing)
Time passed by… I went through thousands of tortures.. It is limit. I have started shouting now…I can’t bear it anymore…. my husband gets very angry and loses control which leads him to beat me up brutally...
You know what..!? At this stage of my life, I m in the middle of no-where. I have so many options, but no choice to Choose any!
I am emotionless now... Compromising for my daughter... For having my girlie good future & and to give her dads love....I never thought of separation.
Nothing lasts forever, and so does my pain.. Probably..!?
* Year 2011: This is year 2011 and this is Me ;) I am a woman of 21st century. A modern educated girl who knows her all rights. I m living a life with a beautiful daughter and husband in the valley of love & Peace and yes..Compromise!.... I have a well decorated house, a cutest daughter... I enjoy facebooking, I post my "HapPy FamiLy" pictures and get hundreds of Likes... & yes..! when he beats me up.. I wear layers of makeup and smile :)
Sssshhh...!
Don't speak loudly.. don't Whisper.. So that I can't hear you..
My crushed emotions and dried tears have just slept...I dont want my wishes to wake up.. I have made them sleep after years of Compromises.. and Sacrifices ..!
Let them die..
[A True story of my friend]
Its really difficult to word such emotions.
Writer : Saira Ali
* I am a GirL *
- I am 19 years old.. Akloti LadLi sister of three brothers...Living like a princess ...A family is coming to see me today... I am feeling so shy and confused..
- I liked him so much... What a teenage girl wants except that…! A well-educated, handsome, well-off man… I liked him with million hearts at first glance. He was just so perfect.. Instead of engagement, my parents decided to do Nikkah & within few months I became Mrs.him …
* Fantasy* Its the most beautiful phase of my life. He calls me from abroad daily…every-second sms, romantic gifts, skyping, chatting all day long.. I am gradually falling in Love with him…He is so caring and loving. We have great Understaning..Uffff ...I am living a fantastic dream.
*Blink*
Just after my bachelors, I became "Dulhan" and officially came to his home..
* Day 1: Its 1st day of my marriage, my mother and sister-in-laws are not so happy, coz my parents didn’t treat them well yesterday. I am so coward..I am so confused.. What a newly wed dulhan can say? My husband is cursing my parents. I don’t know what to do.. I am just quiet. Its the first stage of my Compromise.
* First Week: I am trying my best to adjust in his family. I miss my home badly. My husband doesn’t like to visit my parents often coz it will reduce his value. I am upset. I am trying hard to understand a NEW he. Thumbs up..! I have sucessfully passed another stage of Compromise...
* First Month: Oh, so he smokes as well, Shock after shock… tears after tears… Now I am having an idea about his past affairs too.. So what if he had affairs in past..?! He is all mine now... Lets Compromise & be happy !
* Few Months Later: My in-laws are having so many issues. Why my parents don’t visit me… and when they do, they don’t like it too..! Why my parents didn’t greet them on Eid? and why they didn't bring this and this in Eidi...? I have sealed my lips… gulped my tears… crushed my emotions... I am smiling...I am a Compromising Robot....! Order me, i'll smile.. Beat me up, i'll cry... Threat me, i'll glue my lips and gulp my sobs..
* One Year: All my sorrows have just vanished. I am holding my cutest daughter in my arms.. Everyone is happy. I smiled & closed my eyes…
But why my parents didn’t do the “RASAMS”.. I am being punished…It is hell depressing… I m going through Post Partum depression (Sounds silly...?? give it a Google search. 90% of women go through it, even their life partner don’t know about it. Instead, they curse the girl and her upbringing)
Time passed by… I went through thousands of tortures.. It is limit. I have started shouting now…I can’t bear it anymore…. my husband gets very angry and loses control which leads him to beat me up brutally...
You know what..!? At this stage of my life, I m in the middle of no-where. I have so many options, but no choice to Choose any!
I am emotionless now... Compromising for my daughter... For having my girlie good future & and to give her dads love....I never thought of separation.
Nothing lasts forever, and so does my pain.. Probably..!?
* Year 2011: This is year 2011 and this is Me ;) I am a woman of 21st century. A modern educated girl who knows her all rights. I m living a life with a beautiful daughter and husband in the valley of love & Peace and yes..Compromise!.... I have a well decorated house, a cutest daughter... I enjoy facebooking, I post my "HapPy FamiLy" pictures and get hundreds of Likes... & yes..! when he beats me up.. I wear layers of makeup and smile :)
Sssshhh...!
Don't speak loudly.. don't Whisper.. So that I can't hear you..
My crushed emotions and dried tears have just slept...I dont want my wishes to wake up.. I have made them sleep after years of Compromises.. and Sacrifices ..!
Let them die..
[A True story of my friend]
Its really difficult to word such emotions.
Writer : Saira Ali
I appreciate and praise all what you have written above for your friend. I am sure i cannot do nothing about bringing her smile however i will still pray that her life turns into real happiness.
ReplyDeleteGod Bless her!
Cheers
ohhh...thats so sad...:(((
ReplyDeleteespacially the line 'when he beats me up.. I wear layers of makeup and smile :)'
its just pitiable...:(
kisi k sath b kbi esa na ho...my wish
Dear ajj b bht se ladkiya ayse he zendagi guzarti arahi ha as u apreciat the line above that i wear layers of makeup and smile when he beats me. ....... When my husband beated me first time so after one hour i went and kiss his feet and smiled and said u have rights to do all this to me coz we r womens we have to tolerat duniya ka her duk her tashadud hum urato ke he bardasht krna padta ha
Deleteit's not suppose to be like this. unfortunatly its a true reality...you wouldn't want this for your mother, daughter, or sister... thn why should it be okay for someone to treat you like that. i hope things are better for you now, and may your husband realize how much it mean to have you by his side...
DeleteGod blees her im really impressed by your friend coz she really have a big heart i can understand her coz my story is the same i got love marriage but after that......... All the same happen to me too so got plz give good luck to all the princess of their parents AMEEN
ReplyDeleteYour friend's story is very touching and sad, soo many years of comprimises. You mentioned nikkah, so I'm guessing she's muslim... all you or anyone can do is pray. Pray for her, her daughter, and their well-being. Through your duas and prayers Allah SWT gives you strength, courage, and shows you the way. InshAllah I will remember you in my duas and may there be genuine peace and happiness in your lives. Ameen.
ReplyDelete:( </3 ......
ReplyDeleteOhhhh.... Quite depressing... But alhumdulillah I have married from last 3 years bt I didnt face anything like this... My husband is quite educated.. And loves to behave according to the teachings of islam... if we start practising our islam... None of the above stage would become a hurdle I our lives... ALLAH NE JS KO DEEN K SAMJH DI USKO SUB DEY DIA....
ReplyDeleteAUR TUM MAIN SUB SE BEHATER WOH HAI JO APN BIWI K SATH ACHA HO
I pray for her... May Allah bless her
bushra may Allah bless you and everyone with lot of hapiness always.
DeleteAmazing Saira. You have defined the feelings in amazing manner. Thumbs Up.
ReplyDeleteoooo thats so sad .I will pray for her .
ReplyDeleteSaira...very well expressed.. cant help it...its bitter truth!!
ReplyDeletei never do this n my mom also i m also aiklota n my coming partner is also aikloti of four brother but INSHALLAH i will become her prince n she will become my princess
ReplyDeleten i pray for this couple ALLAH GIVE THEM LOTS OF HAPPINESS IN THEIR LIFE NT HEY ENJOY THERE WEEDING LIFE
story of most of the pakistani girls
ReplyDeletehmm... girl is the 2nd name of happiness, sacrifice n comfort.. give your 100% and leave rest on ALLAH... never ever think that you are alone... because ALLAH is always there with u... n he loves u 70 times more then u do with ur daughter... and sis! remember one thing... this is not the end... one who did wrong... will see it later... pray for ur daughter that may she don't need to bare these sort ov thngs... ALLAH reham karay hum sab pay...!!!
ReplyDeletebitter truth:(
ReplyDeleteAh :(
ReplyDeletesuch a sad story..
And bitter reality of every girl!
And these people are educated jahil.. Yearx and yearx back it was story in makah.. And there came a ray of hope with PBUH(S.A.W) But unfortunately v've again forgotten His sayings!
uffffff so sad
ReplyDeletemari be shadi hony wali h but mujy buht dar lagta h q ky jis insan sy mri shadi ho rahe h mujy pata nae q lagta h wo mujy khush nae rakh sakta
he dont want me he just to touch my body and even he dont care of my feelings he just try to get and hold and use me
plzz evry 1 pry 4r me buz agr me shadi sy na karon to mri to life khrb ho ge hi mry mom dad to jety jee mar jye gye thats why i cnt say any thing to my mom dad
me be buht roti hn hr rat plzz pry 4r me
really girls are made to do sacrifice... compromise makes marriag life easy but from both side... any wayz living my engagement live n m very happy coz he is sacrificing every thing for me :D he will have to do :)
ReplyDeletevoll häftig und mega traurige so etwas wünsche ich keinen sry für deine freundien :(
ReplyDeleteAh! when i was reading this story i feel this is mine....
ReplyDeleteyeah its true...this world is full of good and bad people but to live a life u must have some something special other wise ur gonna die..
ReplyDelete=)excelletn writing sara!
ReplyDeleteNot every word of it but its partially my story as well. its been a year of my being married, but since i didnt have a child i separated n moved out after six months!
cant come upto a conclusion what should i do now!
Allah sab larkion ki kismatein achhi kere! aaj beron ki duao ka matleb samjh ata ha ke arsho ke bhaag legein kaa kia matleb hai